


Nobody cares

by Clairianne



Category: Heavy Rain
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, And I'm shit with naming my works, Angst, Gen, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, not happy for sure, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-22
Updated: 2015-04-22
Packaged: 2018-03-25 07:01:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3801169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clairianne/pseuds/Clairianne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jayden is high. Again. He was clean for more than four months and now he's not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nobody cares

**Author's Note:**

> It was written for my fabulous and lovely friend Marusia, who had given me a blayden prompt: "Things you said when you were scared". Long story short it's about Blake and the fact, that he's got feelings, too. Like I once said: nothing is just black or just white. And definitely not Carter. No one can convince me otherwise.  
> Ahh, and you can read as you wish, with or without love between Carter and Norman,

_Maybe that's the bottom of all our problems. Maybe we're unhappy because we can't keep our promises. It doesn't matter for whom we swear; for our parents, our best friends, ourselves ... We still can't fulfill them. And it's not our fault, most of the time. But we still can't be happy, when we failed._  
  
  
Jayden is high. Again. He was clean for more than four months and now he's not.

Not that Blake cares... or counts. Not that he was gazing at him most of the evening, when he saw first well known symptoms. Not that he was looking at him so hard he could see small blood stains on his sleeves and necktie. He still can't believe nobody saw that unfocused eyes and unusual paleness.

Now, he is standing in front of the police station with fourth cigarette plastered to his dry lips. He stays outside more than an hour now, with no intention of coming back.

Nobody cares anyway.

Around him, the rain have no intention to stop falling from the heavy sky. The day became a night nobody knows when, filling the air with October coldness and piercing darkness.

He tries to think about something else, but he can't. It's hard to admit, even to himself, that he cares. Cares very much. And this situation is making him sad. And disappointed... And scared.

"You had seen too much to be touched by that", he tells himself. "You're too old". Maybe he had seen everything, the pain, helplessness, death; but this, this is something else.

It's not new. More than year ago, he saw it all, when they had met for the first time. The same blood, the same eyes, but then feelings were different. He was mad, aggressive and untouched. He was shouting, pulling fully clothed Jayden under the shower and then spending sleepless nights in the cold, wooden floor next to bed with the unconscious man. He is the only one who knows about "the problem" with Norman.

That time he was madly pissed about it. Now, he is scared.

And he can only admit it to himself. Because Carter Blake is never scared, or sad. He is always sarcastic asshole with no intention of helping anybody. He promised himself, a long time ago, that he would never love or even like anybody. He had lost too many people in his life. But now, he knows he has broken his promise.

When did it happened?

Somewhere between origami killer case, days full of rain and moments, when Jayden saved his life. That day spent without raising voices. The moment they started buying coffee for each other. That day they smiled together for the first time. Or maybe when they became partners, not enemies.

Somewhere between all of that Norman stopped taking triptocaine and Blake believed that the small piece of that was caused by him. And he started to think he can do something right, he can make somebody happy.

But now, he is standing in the cold night and he can't even be angry. He doesn't know what happened, why Norman did it. But still, he fails. He fails as a policeman, as a partner... as a friend.

When he is throwing away cigarette end and breathes heavily, Norman stayed next to him. He's only in his well-cut suit and looks as if he wore a heavy burden on his shoulders. And Carter is not able to help him or tell anything right now, so he only clears his throat.

"Put your goddamn jacket on. You will catch a cold", says eventually, hearing how his voice cracks.  
  
_That moment Norman Jayden hears Blayden's sad voice for the first time._

**Author's Note:**

> As always, I'm sorry for mistakes. I think my english is still not as good as it could be.


End file.
